machines.

i got two rolls of film developed today. they came out well, for the most part. they were from my trip to new orleans. i'll put them up on my flickr account tomorrow after i scan them. 

today...was pretty much just homework and band practice and youth group. the music for youth group kinda sucked tonight. we didnt practice much and the tech was screwed up. oh well. 

lately i find myself not caring. about anything, really. things i used to get worried or sad over, just don't make me sad anymore. i'm like a machine. sure, i have my days where the emotion breaks through, but for the most part i'm a full body mask. and i don't know whats under that mask. maybe i'm afraid to look...? 

and now, some lyrics i wrote...

the clouds mark my demise as i find myself thinking about the grass. 

such a cold-hearted killers, as they bend with the wind...we bend with the thought.

a bird in flight and it's unaware of his plight

 because gravity...it's ever pulling us towards the broken stems. 

it's broken. it's gone. and i'm wondering if this was worth all the effort it took to make you believe me. 

i'm a plane flying upside down, all around. perpendicular to the horizon

and the horizon holds my dreams. 

such an abrupt change... the weeds are dry and broken, resembling my condition. 

i wrote this note to help you see...or if i'm lucky it will make you me.

the desert groans for the grass and the grass pleads for water, such a dependent state.

the desert opens for me and i'm lost in it. 

what a desirable end, you can't deny your joy.

what a dependable friend i have in your inconsistent emotion. 

<3still.

-kevin lee