machines.

i got two rolls of film developed today. they came out well, for the most part. they were from my trip to new orleans. i'll put them up on my flickr account tomorrow after i scan them. 

today...was pretty much just homework and band practice and youth group. the music for youth group kinda sucked tonight. we didnt practice much and the tech was screwed up. oh well. 

lately i find myself not caring. about anything, really. things i used to get worried or sad over, just don't make me sad anymore. i'm like a machine. sure, i have my days where the emotion breaks through, but for the most part i'm a full body mask. and i don't know whats under that mask. maybe i'm afraid to look...? 

and now, some lyrics i wrote...

the clouds mark my demise as i find myself thinking about the grass. 

such a cold-hearted killers, as they bend with the wind...we bend with the thought.

a bird in flight and it's unaware of his plight

 because gravity...it's ever pulling us towards the broken stems. 

it's broken. it's gone. and i'm wondering if this was worth all the effort it took to make you believe me. 

i'm a plane flying upside down, all around. perpendicular to the horizon

and the horizon holds my dreams. 

such an abrupt change... the weeds are dry and broken, resembling my condition. 

i wrote this note to help you see...or if i'm lucky it will make you me.

the desert groans for the grass and the grass pleads for water, such a dependent state.

the desert opens for me and i'm lost in it. 

what a desirable end, you can't deny your joy.

what a dependable friend i have in your inconsistent emotion. 

<3still.

-kevin lee

I am the speaker but what is responsibility?
This is beg of you, build me brick upon brick.
High tides; waves of hypocrisy.
I didn't think the clock struck more than twelve times.
I decided to name her insomnia.
"Her teeth (show) like white seeds in a scarlet fruit"
This I must tell you, old friend: fear beauty.
This is meager, this is feeble.
She was only a fiction and my creation

-tdwp


i know you're reading this, and i'd just like to tell you that i really really miss you. i'll be patient and wait for all this to be over. and when it is, i'll be waiting. we'll pick up where we left off.

<3forever.

may fire.

oh grave, where is thy victory?

dreams.

--- I dreamed that I was playing my guitar and singing my songs in front of a bunch of people. I hadn’t seen you in two months. As I was playing, I kept gazing around the room searching for you. Finally I found you sitting in the back with a guy. I got excited and almost stopped playing, but I kept going—hoping that you’d look up at me. Eventually you did, but it was like you didn’t recognize me. I stopped playing and waved, but you just turned away and hugged the guy sitting next to you. I started crying and couldn’t play any longer.

-- I dreamed that I was at work. I was busy cleaning something when I looked up across the hall, and there you were at the end. We stared at each other for a second, and then ran to each other. But before we got to each other, I woke up. It was 3:17 am.

-- I dreamed that I was in a large city. I was lost in a large crowd, and kept searching for a familiar face. I caught a glimpse of yours, and began to head your way. But when I got to where I had seen you, you were gone. Then all of a sudden I was in my room and you were sleeping on my bed.

gravity.

home from louisiana. at least i think i am...


"above the clouds on floor thirty-four
and the mississippi winds its way through the city lights.

i dreamed last night that you had called, but your voice...
it wasn't the same as it was yesterday.

at least gravity is on my side. "

-me.


yo mutha, don't like steal the lyrics i post on here...i just realized that someone could totally steal my stuff. that wouldn't be nice...

a stick figure illustration.

it was evident.